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People Get Married For The Strangest Reasons Too

August 16, 2011

I have to say it to the Christians who get married for the wrong reason and there are a lot who do get married for the right reason and live it correctly; to pro-create children and then living a chaste life as husband and wife. 

I do believe some people are getting married so they can use each other for their own lusts and pleasures; which St. Augustine of Hippo says in his sermons on marriage; is not right but wrong and sinful.  I would like to ask them, “what is next for you since you used your husband or you have used your wife to fullfill your lustful pleasures?  Will you stay married or since you got what you wanted; will you leave and find another woman or man to fulfill your other lustful pleasures?

Then, the other strange reason is greed. 

Do you think getting married because the guy you are marrying has a lot of money; do you think you will be truly happy?  No, you will be miserable, you will always be running; because once you have the money, you still want more and more.  Getting married for greed is not getting married.  You love the money rather than the person you are marrying.

Then parents set up their daughter with another parents’ son and make them marry.  Arrangaged marriage and the children have no say on it.  St. Augustine of Hippo says that is wrong as well. 

A man and woman must freely leave their parents home and parents and come together freely and be married and truly love the person they are marrying; this love is not lustful or greedful or prideful; but agape love; a love God has for us and we should have on the people we are to marry; because they should love each other so much; they would do anything to get each other into the highest part of heaven and love them as Jesus loves the Church; He gave his life for the Church on the cross and the spouses are to be that way for each other and for their children. 

You should also love your spouse; man and woman; in this type of love: Philia or brotherly love; because we are brothers and sisters as God’s adopted children.  Even the children you will have during marriage the natural way of pro-creating them in the sexual union between husband and wife or by adoption. 

Also the man and woman who is to become husband and wife must go through the proper classes and it shouldn’t be no three day or week classes; should be over a long period of time to help them understand what the Sacrament is and to help them mature in their faith and love for God and for His Church.  It shouldn’t be too easy or too hard but right in the middle on difficult on the classes.  They should read what the Church Fathers and Doctors of the Church wrote on marriage and go through a bible study class using the Navarre Bible.  They should go through a class on studying the Catechism of the Catholic Church.  It should be in a Monastic setting; in a friary or monastery with faithful monks or friars who are faithful to the Catholic Church and who do not practice the occult.  So the couple can live under the same roof but far a part in different monastic cells and pray with the monks, get spiritual direction and Confession from the monks and take part in the Traditional Latin Mass and the certain liturgy of the hours lay men and women can take part in.  This way they can hear God talking to them and truly learn how to pray. 


3 Comments leave one →
  1. August 16, 2011 3:16 pm

    The comment here confuses me “to pro-create children and then living a chaste life as husband and wife.” Do you believe chastity belongs in marriage? Are we not called to serve eachother? Why would a man be ordered in Proverbs to drink from his own well? Is that water in fact sin? I would also be very curious to know how you explain the Songs of Solomon.

    • August 16, 2011 3:33 pm

      to pro-create is to make the babies in the sexual union when the couple is married. St. Augustine of Hippo’s sermon: Many Wives and Many Children; he talks about the Patriarchs of the Old Testatment how they had many wives: ”So those holy godly men of yore, the Patriarchs, my dear Men and Women of God, sought children; yes, they wanted to raise children. To achieve that goal thhey were joined to women; for this purpose they had intercourse with women to procreate children. And so it was permitted to them to have a number of wives. If unbridled lust were a virtue pleasing to God at that moment in history, He would’ve permitted one woman to have many husbands; that’d give her parity with the man who could have many wives. Why didn’t all the chaste women have more than one husband? Could it be that many women had one husband because it had something to do with the numerosity of the race? If that’s the norm, then one woman with many men couldn’t increase the productivity of the race the way one man with many women can. Wherefore, my Brothers and Sisters, if our Patriarchs married women and serviced them for no other reason than siring children, then they would’ve been more than pleased, wouldn’t they? If they could’ve had the children without intercourse. What I mean to say is, they did what they did, no for the lust of it, but for the duty. All of which brings us back to Joseph. Wasn’t he still a father even if he got his son through a route other than concupiscene? Far be it that Christian chastity should have something to do with it! Certainly Jewish chastity had nothing to do with it at all! To conclude this point, love your wives, but love them chastely. Do the animal thing but only for the begetting of children. Because it’s the only way to do it, but wistfully, wishing there were a better way. Count it as a residue of our common father Adam. Now there’s no need to trumpet his punishment. He brought it upon himself when he sinned; and from that moment on his children were mortal. Unfortunately, this punishment is still in place; God hasn’t taken it away; He’s left it behind as a token of where His embrace-an embrace that hasn’t a whiff of corruption, a sniff of punishment about it.” I will post another sermon on the blog to help you understand.

    • August 16, 2011 3:59 pm

      on the book of Song of Songs; it is the relationship between God and our soul. you read some of the writings of St. John of the Cross to help you understand this.

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